Adolescent Therapy

As a mother of four, I understand…

I have experienced the ups and downs of raising children, especially adolescents.

The pre-teen and teen years can be difficult to navigate – even for the best parents. The adolescent years can be difficult because they talk to their friends but struggle to talk to you.

By the time you figure out what’s happening, you’re surprised. You can even be blindsided. These are the years where an adolescent’s job is to learn how to become an adult, but that is a long hard road for the parents.

It’s hard to know when to hold on and when to let go. It can be very challenging, I know. I lived through it and I survived, but somedays it felt like I was holding on by a thread!

When your teenager enters my office, the first thing they will notice…

… is a friendly, open, and engaged therapist who loves to laugh and understands what they are going through.

They’ll also notice that I really enjoy talking to them – because I do!

Adolescents are fun. The way they think can be creative and out of the box. You never know what you’re going to get.

This helps your adolescent feel safe, understood, and heard (and the sessions aren’t boring!). This is important because if they feel safe, they’ll be more willing to be engaged.

They’ll talk about what bothers them, what hurts them, and about their hopes and dreams.

Therapy offers you and your child the help you need.

The sessions will be tailored to your adolescent’s needs and comfort level…

My first plan of action is to help you and your child feel comfortable and safe.

Therapy can be a daunting experience. It’s not easy talking to a total stranger or turning your child over to one. They don’t know what to expect, and you wonder what the therapist is going to say to your child. Are they going to take my child’s side and alienate them even more? What values are they going to be discussing? What will they be talking about?

All of these are valid questions, and helping you find the answers is important to me. Your adolescent may be afraid it’s going to be boring, that they’ll have nothing to talk about – or if they do talk, they’ll be judged. So, the first thing I do is get to know you both and let you get to know me. If you are comfortable, healing happens faster.

As they become more comfortable, we will work on building their self-esteem by helping them develop self-love and self-acceptance.

One of my favorite things to do is to help your adolescent discover their strengths and their uniqueness so that they develop a sense of self and feel really good about who they are. This happens naturally as I get to know them. There are no fancy worksheets; just open dialogue and discovery.

I will teach them how to identify and challenge their negative thoughts.

Remember those pesky negative thoughts of: “I’m not good enough, I’m not smart, etc.”? As they begin to explore their thoughts and feelings, we will expose the lies and replace them with truths. When they learn this skill, their confidence will grow, and their depression and anxiety will lessen.

They’ll develop healthy strategies for managing negative feelings.

In session sometimes we might blow bubbles to practice deep breathing (and have a little fun), they’ll play with stress balls, practice mindfulness techniques, draw or write their feelings. These skills will help your child learn to replace negative patterns to manage bad feelings with healthy and fun skills.

They’ll learn their uniqueness and their value.

I know it’s been difficult. Sometimes, all you can see these days is an angry upset child. But, truth be told, your child is special. How do I know this? In my eyes, no matter what they’ve done, they are unique and have great value. They just don’t know it yet. My job is to help them uncover the diamond that’s buried under the coal and to understand that no two diamonds are alike. So, they don’t have to be like anyone else; they just need to learn to discover their best self.

As the parent, you are vital to your adolescent’s healing…

In parenting sessions, you’ll have a safe space to express your fears and frustrations.

It’s hard being a parent of an adolescent, I don’t care what anyone says. It’s not an easy job. They are exploring the world in ways you never imagined, taking risks they shouldn’t, and doing things that can be downright shocking! This can increase your feelings of hopelessness, anger, frustration, sadness, and hurt.

Sessions for you will be a safe place where you can explore and express these feelings – a place for you to be heard and understood.

You’ll also learn new ways of communicating with your child.

During our parenting sessions, we will explore your patterns of communication that are leading to arguments and help you learn and practice new ways of managing the dialogue that help you both feel heard and understood. I’ll help you manage your anger in the situation, so you can hear your child’s needs and not just their words.

You’ll also gain more understanding and insight into your child’s behaviors.

Our time spent together will also include helping you to better understand their needs, their hurts, their behaviors. When you’re arguing with you child, it’s hard to hear those things. All you know is, they’re not listening. This can get in the way of understanding each other and of feeling connected. By helping you gain more insight into your child, you will begin to feel closer, have better communication, and feel more connected.

You’ll acquire parenting “tips and tricks” to help you manage the “bad days” in ways that will reduce the power struggle you feel in your home.

I know you’re probably wondering, “All this sounds good, but what do I do when they are acting out, yelling, screaming, or not doing what they’re told?”

That’s a good question! That’s what I’m here for: to help you develop a new way of disciplining that doesn’t boil down to rewards and consequences.

You’ll learn tips like asking for a compromise or offering two choices. I’ll help you gain an understanding of choosing your battles to reduce conflict and what to do when they seem out of control. You’ll develop the skills that will reduce the tug of war and the back and forth bickering that is common in homes with adolescents, and your relationship will stop feeling like one big battle.